My Reality

So I've been watching The Blueprint for the second time, and I've been getting different things from it than I did before. The first time, I pretty much got "Go out, have fun, approach." Now I'm getting something quite a bit different - expand your reality. This has caused me to think about where my reality stands right now.

I think that doing a shitload of cold approaches has firmly put approaching in my reality. I will admit that I still get AA from time to time, but I have no problems approaching. I have quality conversations with girls who I meet in public places, and often get numbers and the like.

The thing that is out of my reality is escalating the interaction to the close. I'm ok with talking to the girl, and with kinoing. I don't number close enough, but it isn't my largest sticking poing. The main issue is that I don't escalate to the next level. Last night, I was out with an awesome wing, and I had a great interaction with a girl who I was genuinely attracted to. She was really cool, and we had a great conversation that lasted about an hour and a half. But, for some reason, I couldn't escalate. I kept kinoing her on the arm, and even pushed a bit further a few times, but I was too much of a wimp to push onwards. I wanted to grab her hand, but couldn't bring myself to do that. She was here on business, and left town today, so it was pull or nothing. So I choded out, and didn't escalate hard for fear of losing the validation that I was getting. After a while, she got tired, and went home. Bullshit - I shouldn't be doing this.

I think that escalating isn't firmly in my reality. I need to push the interaction ruthlessly, escalate, isolate, and obliterate. The only way I am going to get closing into my reality is by closing, and the only way to close is to push myself further than I had before. This isn't hard stuff. I know that I am capable of doing it.